Self-Help Happiness Blog

Happiness can be found wherever you look for it.  For instance, in the Dancer from Khiva.  This is a Russian book, translated into English, about Bibish, who was kidnapped and driven out to the desert to be gang-raped…and life rolls on from there with all the consequences, such as never being able to be married as a result (but she does).  And never being able to dance because dancing is frowned upon in her village (but you know the title of the book!)

There si a more complete review of the book here, but they message for you today is that we all are driven down the road of circumstance, but we all have the option of turning the steering wheel.  Yes, some things happen that really suck.  It is up to you to decide just how badly they will suck and how happy you will choose to be, despite circumstances.

“Short people got…no reason.  Short people got…no reason.  Short people got…no reason to live.”

Remember that old Randy Newman song?  Good thing I don’t always pay attention to the lyrics.  And I think this diminutive giant will also ignore the finding of a new Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index study.

The folks at Gallup have come up with data showing that below average height men are angrier, more irritable and more stressed than average.  On the other hand, they found that taller guys feel more happiness and enjoyment in their lives.

Well they didn’t survey me!

Here is a little something the folks at Gallup have to say about height and money:

“Alternatively, each additional inch of height has the same effect on reported life satisfaction as a four percent increase in family income.”

Since we know that money can’t buy happiness for most people, although it does alleviate frustrations and stress for those who are well-below the poverty line, does this mean that a really short person who gains an inch (high heels, anyone?) gets happier, but a taller person would not benefit from growing? 

Probably.  But Gallup doesn’t say.  (Why don’t they ask the really interesting questions?)

What Gallup does say is that taller people make more money than short people  (NEWSFLASH: High ROI from high heels!), so could that explain why they are happier?

“People with more education have higher income and higher status jobs, and they earn more money. Money, in turn, is a powerful predictor of life satisfaction.”

 Gee, Gallup.  Now my education and income aren’t good enough for you either?

Ladies, the news is a little less grim for you, perhaps because you are not expected to be as tall as I am, so at least you have an excuse.  But taller women still get all the good stuff, education, status, income, just with slightly less of a complex if you aren’t named America’s richest man this year.

Read into the report what you want, but I’m not paying attention.  I can make my own happiness.  And you can too!

Lloyd Garver of the Norwich Bulletin is obviously not a big fan of happiness books, but at least he refers to mine as… ”Some of these popular happy books include, ‘Climb your Stairway to Heaven: The 9 Habits of Maximum Happiness’“.

The problem with Mr. Garver is probably not so much his grumpiness, but his poor sense of direction.  See what else he says, “The reason you can’t find the kind of book you’re looking for is that all the self-help books about how to be happy fill up the shelves. Ironically, this makes some of us quite unhappy.”

Fortunately for us and for the sake of clarity, he does specify what kind of book you’re looking for.  A real book.  Hey, those are his words, not mine.

If books about happiness and self-help are not what he is looking for, why is he looking in the self-help section?  I have to assume he is simply lost, because obviously he won’t find any real books there.  Either that, or he is a very grumpy man with a great sense of theatrics (not to mention irony).  And nothing makes a grumpy person grumpier than a happy person saying to him, “Smile!”  (Yes, grumpy people really, really hate happy photographers!)

If the bookstores would kindly provide visitors with maps when they enter the store, people who don’t want to be happy can avoid accidentally finding themselves surrounded by all those threatening smiley faces.  And they can get on with the business of finding “real books”, which apparently bookstores don’t seem to stock anymore.

That oughta solve the problem.

Hmm…I wonder what he would think of a happiness blog. 

Yes, it’s official.  People with strong literacy skills are happier than those who struggle with reading.  But I didn’t have to tell you that, right?

A study by the National Literacy Trust shows that men and women alike are less likely to marry, less likely to own a home, more likely to live still with their parents and less likely to feel satisfied with life if they can’t read.

Of course, you always have to be careful, because statistics can say pretty much whatever you want.  Lower literacy means a lower paying job in most cases, which might in turn explain the findings.  Or lower levels of happiness in certain people might lead then to read less and learn less.  Cause and effect are not always easy to establish. 

That being said, literacy facilitates so much that a focus on increasing a person’s literacy should help them in many facets of their lives, most likely also in their happiness (being able to read is very empowering).

And if literacy in one language is empowering, what about literacy in several?  

For those interested in reading the report in its entirety:
http://www.literacytrust.org.uk/Research/literacy_changes_lives.html

Today’s Los Angeles Times has a feature on happiness, my favorite topic.  The feature helps debunk a lot of myths, mostly that things and circumstances make us happy, sad, angry or whatever.  Here is the paragraph that most people should read:

Lyubomirsky and her colleagues analyzed studies on identical twins and other research and came to the conclusion that happiness is 50% genetic, 40% intentional and 10% circumstantial. “Half of your predisposition toward happiness you can’t change,” she says. “It’s in your genes. Your circumstances — where you live, your health, your work, your marriage — can be tough to change. But most people are surprised that circumstances don’t account for as much of their happiness as they think.”

Just for the record, there really is not an accurate way to measure happiness, because ti is such a subjective issue.  However, a 50-50 divide between genetics and environment is generally considered a good rough estimate by more happiness researchers.  Depending on the effort you make or do not make, I am sure that number is very elastic, but let’s play with that number for now. 

The L.A. Times feature continues on other pages, too.  For instance, there is an excellent list of handy tips for “cultivating happiness” .

 Happy reading.

Can happiness come from the state?  Not likely.  The state is there to help us organize our society to some extent, at least to avoid chaos and help us protect ourselves from individuals and groups who might want to harn us.  As such, it acts as a bit of an insurance against total misery.  But now some UK city councils want to develop policies to help us increase happiness.

 I doubt this will lead to much, but it certainly is a step above just promoting economic well-being.  Read about it here.

Over at the Accumulating Peripherals blog, there is a discussion on the pros and cons of happiness research.  Matt offers explains his beef with happiness research and I have commented also on the discussion.

Much of the happiness research out there is based on self reporting.  In other words, it asks you if you feel happy.  OK, so the questions are more complex, but it basically asks for your opinion.  On the one hand, that is poor science, because our perceptions of things are rarely accurate.  A good example is how a couple high-profile crimes can get a city or even a whole country talking about how the crime rate is on the rise and it’s about time we stop the growing menace — even while statistics show that year after year the crime rate has slowly been declining.

On the other hand, happiness is a subjective thing.  It is something we feel, and it could be argued that the only valid measurement of happiness is our perception of it.  Please feel free to go over to Matt’s blog and comment.  And then please come back here and comment, too.

This is not a new theme, the importance of sleep for happiness.  A well rested person thinks more clearly and is much less likely to react sharply at the slightest provocation.  A sleep-deprived person feels more stress and is less effective in everything he does.  There is a superb article with tips for getting a better night’s sleep.

Among the sensible tips:

• Avoid a nightcap – alcohol impairs sleep
• Don’t bring a TV to bed – for goodness sakes, is there no escaping that thing?!
• Go to bed earlier
• Don’t argue just before bed – stress makes for less “productive” sleeping

Good night. 

The May / June edition of No Limits Magazine features a story by somebody I know well…me!  It came as a surprise, but it was arranged by my Australian publisher, where you can pick up a copy of 9 Habits of Happiness if you live in Australia or in New Zealand.

The story, by the way, is one of my favorites from a few years back, when we ran into some unexpected adversity on what should have been a highlight of our honeymoon…and how we turned things around (so it ended up being a highlight of our honeymoon, despite the Wicked Witch Stella!).

The story is just one of many tales I weaved into the book. 

New Brunswick has done it again, once more making happiness news.  Maclean’s reports that Saint-John is home to Canada’s happiest people.  In 2007, New Brunswick scored happiest among Canadian provinces in the Relative Happiness Index.

I am sure this will help boost their moods as they clean up after the unusual spring floods.